Kitchen Chaos Aficionados Pillows

'Doctor said to burn more calories.'

An Energetic Susan.

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Cookbooks

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

"I've had it with you guys! From now on, have your arguments on your own time!"

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

Man's cooking explodes.

Cafe Burns.

Vegetable Cook

Ten out of ten for effort...

Girl who can't cook meets guy who can't fix stuff.

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

Anti-inflammation recipes

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

Snow & Flo series: Questionable cooking.

'I couldn't find my measuring cups, so I had to kind of wing it with the stuffing.'

Chef De Party.

'Do you want toast with that?'

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

'Beat 3,000 eggs and add one quart of 10-30W oil? So much for putting my recipes on the computer.'

Cooking

Disaster in the kitchen.

Chef's Specials - Hissy Fits, Shouting and Swearing, Pompus Indigestion.

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

Cook au vin

Chef: 'Howz that Octopus coming along Jeff?'

"Now why would a seagull fly in here and try to establish a rapport with me?"

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

"All right, we straighten this out immediately! René threw the bouillabaisse at Jacques, no? The Jam-bon en croûte was thrown by Jacques at René, correct? The truite en gelée and the fraises des bois were thrown by François at Henri, and Henri threw the mousse au chocolat at François, and . . ."