Kitchen Appliance Designer Gifts

'Forget toys, Claus - you're being transferred to kitchen appliances.'

At the Hamilton Beach company mixer.

Come dine with me!

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

'Does this thing get channel four.'

"We needed to replace our kitchen floor and it kind of grew from there."

'I put the cake in the blender because I wanted a glass of cake.'

"Oh no I left my bagpipes in the oven."

'Shall we turn the extractor fan down a bit...?'

Cook in the cookery section.

"Do we really need the interactive garbage disposer?"

"Well..I think the old Thermograph machine I rescued from work goes a treat with our kitchen units."

'Harry won't even build me a new kitchen.'

"All new appliances, brand new subway tile backsplash and a unique kitchen island; notice those coconuts!"

"I wonder what our self-cooking kitchen has for us today."

Cooking

"We need a new stove. This one's beginning to burn oil."

'Isn't it great? It gives us four times the storage space as a regular fridge!'

"And not only do I make my own pizza sauce, I have a special way of crushing the tomatoes!"

I Bake. Deal with it.

"This is our high-traffic, reinforced, heavy-duty model."

"I can't get the price sticker off this non stick pan, you sold me!"

"I bought this 'automatic bread maker', and so far it hasn't made any!"

Swiss Army Stove.

'It's lovely. Have you actually built a flat-pack kitchen before?'

You missed a spot!

'I wish somebody would invent the TABLE!'

'Ahh, but it's a Dyson saltshaker.'

'I can't make dinner right now - I'm installing new software.'

'Of course, the self-cleaning models tend to cost a little more.'

The History of Anti-stick

Jim's Smart Kettle

Ship's cook escaping in a saucepan.

"The distressed-style wood flooring we installed in the kitchen seems to have crept into Fred!"