Kindergarten Teacher Gifts

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN, 'It's okay, I guess, but they sure hassle you about compliance!'

"Every day it's the same. My class starts out as Sesame Street and ends up as Jerry Springer."

"Do we have to use our inside voices through clenched teeth like you, Ms. Baker?"

"Hey, you guys, don't you remember? The big word here is 'compromise.' "

Head Start Nursery.

Teacher Reading Book Upside-Down to Class.

"This is kindergarten, Mason. You can think outside the box, but you'd better color between the lines."

'Do you think our teacher liked kids when she was one?'

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN! "It was mostly okay, but there's way too much micromanagement!"

"O.K. Kindergarten friends, let's sing together... 'If you're happy and you know it - and you've washed your hands for at least 20 seconds and you've squirted some sanitizer on them - clap your hands.'"

'I took her to register in kindergarten, and they wanted a damage deposit.'

"That's a LOVELY drawing, Sophie! Now let's draw one with mummy's head like a big round balloon."

'I know it's your first day, Ms. Smith. Come down, the high standards we set will all fall into place, besides they're just kindergartners.'

The neighbors were not sure what to think of the young Picasso's snowman

"Let's have refreshments on parents' night. These people need nourishment."

"Of course, that's only a first draft."

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

'My mom got it on. She said you'd get it off.'

BUSINESS PRESCHOOL

"I wonder if I should ask him to play."

"How much longer will we have to help Besty with her homework?"

'I got one tough kindergarten teacher. You have to check your cell phones at the door.'

'Kindergarten sounds a lot like a cult to me!'

If you're happy and you know it...

"Miss? When's the ad break?"

'Every child is an artist but it appears your Candice is a plumber.'

"As kindergarten taught me, a liberal application of glitter can hide a host of flaws."

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

'Kiddie school is teaching about sharing; and someone shared their cold with Jennie,'

''Show and Tell' is NOT an invasion of privacy!'

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'Boy, talk about psychobabbl!'

What's the difference between teacher kindergarteners and college students?

'No Beaujolais? What do you mean, no Beaujolais?! What kind of joint is this??!'

"They can run but they won't be able to hide."

"Today in school we learned how to glue!"