Kid Courtroom Enthusiasts Pillows

'Can Bradley come out and litigate?'

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

I love Lawyers

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"I object!" "Overruled!"

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

Yawning barristers in court

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

The Birth of a Lawsuit

Sue The Bastards

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

Say what? Johnnie Cochran died in 2005?

'He followed me home, Mom. Can I sign him to a five-year, $80-million contract?..'

'Every day, I'm suing better and better...'

'At first it was a few dollars here and a few dollars there. Then I realized I'd have to pay my lawyer.'

RBG, RGB, CMYK

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to sue, and he'll eat for a lifetime."

Baby's first words.

"You don't have to answer that."

Criminal Stupidness

AMERICAN CIVIL LIBERTIES UNION ACLU, HELP TAKE A BITE OUT OF LAW, 'I like it!'

There's no such thing as "The Fruit Basket Defense." By any chance, are you referring to "The Fruit of the Poisonous Tree"? That's evidence that was obtained by an illegal action and must be considered inadmissible. Yeah! What you said!!!

"Not guilty, Your Honor, on the basis of a previously undiagnosed and untreated case of Integrity Deficit Disorder!"

Judge

'Sorry, but I do not recall that incident either.'

'Great. Another trainee lawyer.'

"This is a complex matter, we can't keep repeating 'Possession is nine tenths of the law' at the judge."

Truth, Justice, Equality and Public Relations

'Being granted immunity doesn't include not having to pay my bill.'