Kid Courtroom Enthusiasts T-Shirts

'Can Bradley come out and litigate?'

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

I love Lawyers

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"I object!" "Overruled!"

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

Yawning barristers in court

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

Sue The Bastards

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."

The Birth of a Lawsuit

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

'Every day, I'm suing better and better...'

'He followed me home, Mom. Can I sign him to a five-year, $80-million contract?..'

'At first it was a few dollars here and a few dollars there. Then I realized I'd have to pay my lawyer.'

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to sue, and he'll eat for a lifetime."

Baby's first words.

"You don't have to answer that."

Criminal Stupidness

'Great. Another trainee lawyer.'

AMERICAN CIVIL LIBERTIES UNION ACLU, HELP TAKE A BITE OUT OF LAW, 'I like it!'

'Sorry, but I do not recall that incident either.'

Judge

"Not guilty, Your Honor, on the basis of a previously undiagnosed and untreated case of Integrity Deficit Disorder!"

"This is a complex matter, we can't keep repeating 'Possession is nine tenths of the law' at the judge."

Truth, Justice, Equality and Public Relations

'Don't worry, you're a politician. You'll have no trouble pleading insanity.'

'Being granted immunity doesn't include not having to pay my bill.'