Key Collectors Pillows

"Well, no wonder the key doesn't work. This ain't my car."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"On the plus side, I finally have a key to the executive washroom."

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"Do you buy cars here?"

'So you have a PhD, big deal, everyone working here has one! The question is, what can you really do?'

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'You don't have the muscles to buy a muscle car, dear.'

'God's speed.'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'Ok, give me your username & password one more time.'

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"Donald, the dog wants to get back in."

'Mom, dad's toasting the new year with the car again!'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"...and it comes with sat-nav, which as you can see the previous owner used all the time."

"Hey, Dad, guess what? My Honus Wagner baseball card is worth $2.1 million!"

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

Acme Flyswatters.

"There it is...the car of my dreams! It's the perfect match! The seat...the steering wheel...they just call my name! I'm not leaving here without it!"

"You get one every time you order something online."

James May

"I wonder what this was for."

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

'But, honey, the girl in the bikini only adds to the awesomeness of my car.'

'How old is this vase?'

'...but the good new is your old Enron stock has become a high-priced collectible!'

It says, "In lieu of gifts, please consider a donation to the automaker of your choice." Invite!