Junior Sleuth Gifts

'It's just homework...there's no conspiracy.'

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

A boy acting suspiciously

Paranormal A-Z...

$1: Family Secrets

He looks so natural lying there...

Ducks and hares taken in by a wolf at a seance

"He was WOK-ing in a winter wonderland."

'Yes, they were using it to clean up the graffiti!'

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

'Should I just hit 'reply to all' and save the government the trouble?'

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

'The police is looking for a teenager who reads books... I bet they'll never solve this case!'

The Modern Godot

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

"The sellers recommended that I burn some sage during the tour."

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

'Okay - Let's crash that bad boy.'

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

"Do you see the one who possessed your soul?"

The response of a spirit during a seance is in fact an annoyed neighbour.

'So far we don't have any suspects.'

'...and where did you bury the bone?'

Lost Property - Missing Head

No, you were supposed to check the doorbell camera before lowering the drawbridge.

"I found a partial thumbprint. Let's get the heck out of here"

"I know it's the right thing to do, but if we call the cops this sandbox will be tied up for weeks."

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

Two men converse secretively

"The butler did it!"

"...He appears to have stepped away from his body."

Scarecrow.

"Hi everyone, thanks for channeling in to help me with my ancestry project."

'He's not having an affair Ma'am: He goes out at night mainly to chase cars and eat from garbage bins...'