Journey Joker Pillows

"Were you using your mobile?" "How could I possibly? I've had my hands full eating and smoking!"

'Backseat driver...'

"There is a 5 month slow down. You are still on the fastest route. You will arrive next year."

The bus home.

World Tour.

'Are we nearly there yet?'

'My wife is going to kill me. All her shopping coupons are in that lost luggage.'

"This seat with extra legroom is great."

The Paper Route

Dracula vacationing in Venice feeding bats in the Piazza of St. Mark.

Vampire on a plane

"It's my helper trout!"

You are now leaving Everything..."Well, now I've seen everything."

Jack in the Box Oxygen Mask

"During our vacation my wife and I went to Paris while our suitcases went to Rome and Athens."

Distance to horizon varies.

Desert Roundabout

"It's kind of hard to know where these photos were taken: The backgrounds are very similar..."

"Not wearing deodorant is not what I meant by 'respect the local customs'"

"You heading south again this summer?"

"You have luggage? - Oh, we don't do LUGGAGE any more."

'I may not have the skills or education for this position, but I do understand the cartoons in the The New Yorker.'

Roger couldn't understand why his diet wasn't working.

How do fish get to work?

'I've only packed essentials! CD player, hair dryer, eight new tops and a sun lamp.'

'I brought my mini bar with me.'

Man on tube using dreadlock as support.

No petting in the pool!

Beach Burger - without sand 75 cents extra.

'We found your luggage! It went to Buffalo!'

Tedium Tours.

"Please remove your shoes, realize you forgot to wear socks, accept your fate, and make peace with your god."

'What about short-term? Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

'This went faster before his bladder gave out.'

'It gets me from A to B alright but it won't get me from B back to A!!'