Journalism Aficionado Gifts

"What about 'Liar, liar pants on fire'?"

'For God's sake step back and let the TV cameras through!'

"Remember, sir, spin control is passe. Just lie your ass off."

'What would your mum say if she saw you drawing all over the wall like that?'

Oligarchy

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'You're going to have your future cut out for you, reading bedtime stories.'

'Where was the TSA?'

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

"Why don't you ever fetch anything good like a pizza?"

Stephen Spender.

Gunter Grass

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

Our Two Parties, Explained

'Don't worry, you're safe. I started my diet today.'

"Are all Brits bisexual, or just the ones who publish their diaries?"

The Gettysburg Address in process.

Man Reading Laptop.

"Weather like this plagued my retreat from Moscow."

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

Matryoshka/ Russian Gas Cylinders

Günter Grass

Fear of news.

'...Next election voters will have a choice of democrat, republican and 'generic'.'

Noel Coward.

'Hey!! What gives, there's nothing but a bunch of squiggly lines on this newspaper.'

Ironing Punctuation

Unlikely Couples #136: Jim and Sheryl Crow

'He speaks for our entire generation. Pity he's such a bore...'

Sherlock Holmes Museum: No Hounds.

Tesseract of the D'Urbervilles.

My Literary Influences

Frontispiece to 'Dombey and Son'

"Wow. . . is that you, Mr Erdogan. . . Mr Kim Jong-un. . . Mr Putin. . . Mr Maduro. . . Mr. Bin-Salman. . . Mr al-Assad. . ."