Jokester With A Love For Puns Pillows

Coulda Woulda Shoulda.

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"Of course they're permanent. I'm an artist."

It's an autobiography of a guy who spent his whole life trying to get his first @#^& book published. Editor.

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

Men dancing

I think he's joking. "Placebo" can't be a real medical science term. It sounds like a funny name for a clown.

Pelobong

Leaving cards.

'Todd don't be such a clown...'

"Apparently, I'm fun, but I'm no fun in bed."

"Aha! - Proof that this is definitely an iron-age site..."

'Hey,mom-have you seen my pet frog?'

'Okay Dad, time to unwind.'

"Can you tell the class how you spell Albuquerque?"

'As I feared, the X-ray shows that you are crying inside.'

Nelson.

'And that one painted and forgot to close the curtains.'

'Tender and Juicy.'

'Life size enlargements done here.' - 'Do my pictures of the pyramids please.'

"It's a brovella about my life in the frat. But if it's longer than two hundred pages it becomes a brahvel."

Celebrity Clown Rehab: 'And so how does that make you feel, Chuckles?'

'We're having the whole place done over in pistachio!'

'Did you or did you not make my client laugh so hard that milk came out his nose, causing the kids at his cafeteria table to laugh at him?'

"If we were really best friends, you would be fetching my slippers once in awhile."

Pantomimes Are Lousy Painters. . .

"You may be more familiar with her maiden name, Kelly, Grace Kelly."

'Good morning, 'DICTIONARIES' department for, like, Similes.'

I laughed so hard that milk came out my nose.

Early Greek Humor. I love Aristotle, but oh, Eu-clid!

"If you like the baby pictures you should see the 'Making Of' video!"

'Okay, we'll release one hostage, for six weeks!!'

"An olive or a twist?"

Summer Reading