Joker With A Cause Pillows

'I don't care if it is part of the look. I'm not buying you a handgun.'

"Harold, stop sucking in your stomach when the girls walk by. You're going to hurt yourself."

'Moses, you'd better be in that bathtub!!'

Adult Absence Notes.

"Yep, it says "pesticide"! Not only are they trying to kill us, they also insult us by calling us pests!"

Minority Report Is Real

During the Holiday season, Mr. Arthur Jeffries takes a little time to think of those who are less fortunate.

Mr Kettleband's humour was described as unique.

Sonny Bono - Singer/US Congressman.

Future Medicare Prescription Drug Plans: 'When I grow up, help me enjoy my retirement years. But if at first you don't succeed, try, try again.'

"And did you pack this bag yourself, sir?"

"You're holding a lot of homophobia in your lower back."

'Calm down. I heard them say we're just going into town for haircuts.'

"I don't know who hid it there but that one's got your name all over it."

A child plots to frighten his father with a fake shark fin.

'Please be quiet while the attempts to locate your head.'

Cricket with a hamster in a plastic ball.

'Honestly, I leave you alone for just a couple of minutes...'

"I think it's a Spider Plant bite."

At the National Whoopee Cushion Testing Facility.

"I'm afraid you've got Sea Monkey pox."

"I started my vegetarianism for health reasons, then it became a moral choice, and now it's just to annoy people."

'I've got a strawberry birth mark.'

"Do I come here often?"

"Believe it or not, but we're Batman and Robin off duty!"

'I jogged 120 miles last month and drank 3 gallons of wine. At 40 mpg, I'm doing more than my share for the energy crisis.'

Free Hugs

"To be environmentally responsible I'm recycling my sister's old book reports."

"I'm fairly sure you're supposed to take them off first."

Waiter, who are those protesters outside? They're from "PETFS": People for the Ethical Treatment of Flies in Soup.

"I gave at the office."

The Devil playing a prank on a woman dropping chips on her to attract Gulls.

Ladies-Gents-Whatever

'Sorry, I can't help laughing, but it was a terrible joke...'

Airplanes Wearing Gas Masks During Volcanic Eruption