Humorist With A Cause Pillows

During the Holiday season, Mr. Arthur Jeffries takes a little time to think of those who are less fortunate.

The Supremes Make Me Sick

Ladies-Gents-Whatever

'Calm down. I heard them say we're just going into town for haircuts.'

Lost and Found

Sonny Bono - Singer/US Congressman.

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

Self help acupuncture

Clown on bike.

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

'Perhaps sir would like the dessert menu?'

"Relax. At your age, it's common to have a nose hare now and then."

"The recipe said to let the chicken rest after it comes out of the oven!"

'I'm going to have an out-of-body experience -- can I bring you anything?'

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Today: Yogurt Surprise. We call it "yogurt surprise" because we couldn't read the expiration date on the carton.

Welcome Association of Stage Builders.

"Honey, have you seen my onions?"

'What'll it be?'

'How was your holiday?' - 'Fantastic! Great weather! Great food! No illness!' - 'So, back to work tomorrow, then?' - 'Yeah, I guess so.' - 'Lousy, germ free holiday.'

"Thank you! That last tune took some fancy fingerpickin'. Apologies to those in the front who may have gotten a press - on nail or two in their drink."

Three kids in a trench coat, twenty years later.

'Best watchdog I ever had!'

'Then it's settled. We'll make 7 million with blue handles, 5 million with red handles, 4 million with purple handles and 2 million with green handles.'

'The guy at the end of the bar, would like to know if he can get you to buy him another drink?'

'Damn, I'm out of earshot!'

"Roadkill cookies"

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

300 cows in a field...grazing!

'Like you, I don't know why they feed us every day, but as long as they do it, I'll stay...'

'I told you not to order the chocolate cream surprise.'

"You say we atheists are going to Hell? Look at all the f**ks we give... Go ahead... Look at them all."

Holy Macaroni,

I think he's joking. "Placebo" can't be a real medical science term. It sounds like a funny name for a clown.