Joke Tellers Gifts

Happy birthday to Ewe...'

Lars, I think this comic strip needs a motto. How about "courtesy laughs accepted"?

"Awkward!"

'Dogs should never torment bull elephants and then try to escape down dead-end alleys.'

"How can you cross the road so decisively? I have to stop halfway across every time to rethink it."

Wishing Well 10c. . . Second Wish Free

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

Children disturbing a heart rate reading.

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

Shampoo.

Middle-Age Superheroes

Baby sees bottle with math formula marked, 'Baby Formula'.

How about going easy on the carbs

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

'The boss said I never made any profits and I never found customers worth mentioning and that's why he promoted me to the company's chief bad example!'

It's estimated that millions of trees are planted by forgetful squirrels.

"I've put on a few ounces, but it's mostly paperweight."

Raised by Dogs

'Hang on a minute: You're not going to transform into a Prince and leave me heartbroken, are you?!'

The only time cats are known to laugh.

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

"It's World Cup Soccer, Tia Carmen. The U.S. vs England."

'Ever since I've started showing, my husband has affectionately called me 'Three Humps'...'

'But this is fantastic, professor! It's like no language I've ever seen before!'

'I've only come to get my nail back.'

Baxter Higgleton, word balloon artist.

Pull my finger! Zombie Humor.

'Our family has a dry sense of humor, and we don't laugh that much.'

Your Message on Your T-Shirt: 'Do As You Are Told!'

"Gerald converted the barbecue grill to natural gas."

'I don't think my homework is very good. My dog refused to eat it.'