Job Market Mavens Gifts

"Let there be jobs!"

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

The Three Wise Queens

"And where have you previously moused?"

'I'm afraid you don't have the leadership qualities we're seeking.'

'Do you do self-deprecating humour?'

"Wait, you're firing me?! But I was Time magazine’s Person of the Year!"

"We offer 104 vacation days...otherwise known as weekends."

"After grad school, and before joining Wall Street, I decided to travel a bit."

'Not exactly what I meant by job creation.'

'I told you hard work would pay off in the third grade, Cate...You've had three job offers.'

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

'You've spelt 'C.V.' wrongly.'

Impressive qualifications, but seeing as how I'm trying to fill the position I just fired you from...

"What other skills do you obtain other than being able to answer interview questions?"

'The good news is that from now on I belong to a very rare species. There aren't many personnel managers who create their own pink slip.'

Bank P45's - 'Cashier number 5 please.'

Dolestart - A New Initiative

'The reason I have been able to keep my job through these turbulent times, is that I welcome change, especially if it's from a vending machine.'

"Yes, I can use tools, but I realized early on I could earn more money as an accountant..."

'Are you picky about preferring something with a livable wage?'

Opp'y of a Lifetime

"The labor market is awaiting you!"

The Cattle show Week.

For sale

"It has come to my attention that you may have been somewhat less than forthcoming in your résumé."

'Are you free at the moment?'

'Sorry, you're overqualified for this job.'

Lady in Card Shop sees Sympathy Cards section with 'Bear Market', 'Falling Dollar' and 'Inflation' categories.

"Your former employer said you demonstrated a remarkable amount of 'get up and go'...especially when you were fired."

"I know you used to be our paperboy. That's why when you leave, you'll find your resume on the roof."

'I see an applicant being hired!'

'This is the age of specialisation - you can't be a hunter AND a gatherer.'

"This doesn't have anything to do with the falling price of oil, does it?"