Jimmy Buffett Fans Pillows

"No, Einstein's theory of relativity isn't, 'don't marry your cousin.'"

Batman tissue dispenser.

'I know about the birds and the bees. Can you tell me about making a bundle trading derivatives?'

'Your first cruise then, mate?'

'Got anything with a little less musk?'

'I ran as fast as I could, but I still couldn't catch the Gingerbread Man...'

Bobsled Police.

'I don't want this romantic day to end either, Darla, but I keep worrying I might miss tonight's midnight buffet!'

All You Can Eat

sports bar buffet : Hotdogs/pizza/Corn-on-the-Ty Cobb

'I wouldn't have agreed to let you write your own wedding vows if I knew you were just going to copy the lyrics to Margaritaville!'

Hall of Fame

To the Batmobile!

Relativity explained; the woman on the train will always appear more attractive than the woman on the platform.

"Just suck it up and let him continue binge-watching your entire repertoire."

"Actually, the attraction wasn't freedom from religious persecution but, rather, the all-you-can-eat buffet."

The good and bad news for the species is we have less fat than beef.

Full Moon

Man managing own stock portfolio with vulture in window.

'Arthur Fogle here, pretending to be the next Warren Buffett.'

'This free running craze is becoming a plague.'

'Looks like a new buffet opened up down the street. Feel like checking it out?'

'These days, everyone has a new gimmick.'

The Portuguese Balloon O' War.

Excess Baggage: Cruise passengers can come up with some pretty amazing questions.

'How much could I eat for $20.00?'