Jewish Culture Enthusiasts Gifts

'True happiness!'

"Um, I notice there's nothing in here about pork."

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

Oymoticons

Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

Christmas sweater alternatives

Did you find our menorah?

"I just explained 'kugel' to him."

"What happened to the good old Jewish holidays when all we used to do was eat?"

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

'What, They're comfortable.'

"'Frankenstein' is Jewish. I'm Irish on my mother's side because she was green, and an 'O' Houligan'..."

'Forty years! How come that other guy got away with forty days and forty nights?'

Biblical Jewish Medical Ethics

"First, do no ham."

The Exobus

"In 200 cubits, right-turn, then stay on the current road..."

"You think you're brave? I read Hebrew in front of a live audience."

'I'll let your people go, but making kosher box lunches for them is out of the question!'

"Listen, you'll take another break after Deuteronomy and I'll make you some chicken noodle soup."

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

Joe's Bar: Sorry, closed to the public due to on-premises 'Bar Mitzvah'.

'Not only did he say I can circumcise him, but he also said there'll be six more weeks of winter.'

"May your year be pear-fect."

"Together we are superspreaders of light!"

'The manna? Oh, the manna is great -- Now, about our housing problem....'

'What luck. It's Kosher.'

'We were kind of hoping to let our CONSCIENCE be our guide.'

Safer Torah

'I create them, I liberate them from Egypt, I give them manna, and now they want me to make the sun stand still!'

'Hi. I'm Rabbi Feldman, and I'll be your mohel this evening.'

"I don't care if it's his new year, that's my honey!"

Torah-nosaurus Rex