Jewelry Jester Pillows

'My Medic-Alert bracelet is turning my arm green!'

Fashionable intelligence - 'Oh! here's a go! blowed if I ain't lost my ring!'

Cow Piercing.

"We're following Carrot Top."

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

'Go ahead and laugh, but I lose my keys less frequently than you do.'

"See what I mean? It's going to take a bigger diamond."

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."

'We recommend that you get a ring of equal weight for the other hand to prevent improper alignment of your spine.'

"It's great to see Biff; Socksie the cat is out of the bag..."

"Good artists borrow, great artists steal."

'Or you can rent by the week...'

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

Stepping on clown's shoe...

"Wheeeeeeee!"

'It's one of our new technology rings, it allows you to download karats.'

Tennis ball girl.

"How much did it cost to have your ears pierced?"

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

Will you be mine?

"If I survive this holiday, I'm moving to a pond."

'With this ring I thee dropped it -'

'...And this one comes with a magnifying glass so she can show it off to her friends.'

"Perhaps it wasn't so wise to bring Frosty along!"

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

I think I have a gilt complex.

'Well, the magic of Christmas is officially over, unless it includes waking up to a septic tank backup.'

"It's a beautiful ring. She'll definitely pause for a moment before saying no."

Travelling jesters. No fools left aboard overnight.

'I'm looking for someone who can make me laugh.'

"I need something that says ‘You were right about Trump.’"

'Make sport of the Queen.'

"Mum, I've heard that Faberge eggs are very valuable. What kind of animal is a Faberge?"