Jane Austen Fanatic Gifts

"Is it simply your unsupported word, or did anyone actually see you on the night in question writing a biography of Jane Austen?"

Ancient Landmarks of New York City

Mr. Empirical With "Antarctica""Small is hostile. Rage contributes to shift away from literality. I'm off to True Value Hardware for some more self-reference tools."

Laughing Zone Ahead

"Whether we refer to them as lakes or ponds, it's mere semantics."

Cut out and keep your own Jane Austen.

'...but since no fossils of dinosaur clothing have yet been found, what you see here is mostly speculation.'

'I still don't understand why I couldn't use the path to get your Jane Austen stamps.'

"You need a mint."

"So much for watching a Jane Austen movie with my date. He kept waiting for the car chase!"

'Sorry Gav, it takes more than a wet shirt to look like Mr Darcy.'

Darcy's feelings for Elizabeth increase.

Mothers Pride and Prejudice.

Unsound

'That's my last signing of the cross if you're going to double-cross me like that!'

Scents and Scentsibility. Jane Austen.

Ernie, what's a seven-letter phrase for "sadistic behavior"? Beats me.

Bad Hair Day

"Oh, that Jane. I thought you were talking about Jane Austen."

Jane Austen.

"Do you know what time they open love?"

"It's another letter from Mr. Wentworth. He writes, 'You up?' and then there are some pictures of a smiley face and an eggplant."

"You know, in Jane Austen's time a little well placed irony would have sufficed."

'Express delivery through the Gulf Stream is an extra $2 Sir...'

'I call it my bumper sticker.'

'Do these tight jeans make my top look big in this...?'

"The coach said that you play like Ronaldo? Ha! You loser! He told me I play like Chloe Kelly!"

Gesundheit! - a christmas tree should be fresh.

'What do you mean 'What would Jane Austen do?''

"Remember, now-you're sense, I'm sensibility."

"Doc, she's having contractions!"

'Sorry, Gav, but it takes more than a wet shirt to look like mr Darcy.'

"Urgent message from Captain Sasson, sir - do you know any words that rhyme with orange?"

Cut out and keep your own Mr Darcy!

"I'm sorry if my income is hurtful to you."