Jane Austen Gifts

My mum likes watching costume dramas.

"Gimme a large cheeseburger, regular fries and a diet root beer!"

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

Nerd tryouts.

Aging Support Group

Rejuvenile Delinquents.

Cut out and keep your own Jane Austen.

Nancy Drew Mysteries - The Later Years

'...but you can't keep imagining you're going downhill!'

"So much for watching a Jane Austen movie with my date. He kept waiting for the car chase!"

Baldness Facts

'I still don't understand why I couldn't use the path to get your Jane Austen stamps.'

'Ever think it's a whole new world for us old guys?'

'You and I are going to have a long talk when I get you home.'

'Sorry Gav, it takes more than a wet shirt to look like Mr Darcy.'

Darcy's feelings for Elizabeth increase.

Middle Age Spread.

'What d'you mean-you THINK you've seen this before-you've seen EVERYTHING before!'

Jane Austen.

"Oh, that Jane. I thought you were talking about Jane Austen."

Scents and Scentsibility. Jane Austen.

Mothers Pride and Prejudice.

"Is it simply your unsupported word, or did anyone actually see you on the night in question writing a biography of Jane Austen?"

"Hmm, most common places old farts leave their glasses and car keys!!"

"It's another letter from Mr. Wentworth. He writes, 'You up?' and then there are some pictures of a smiley face and an eggplant."

"You know, in Jane Austen's time a little well placed irony would have sufficed."

'What do you mean 'What would Jane Austen do?''

"Remember, now-you're sense, I'm sensibility."

Cut out and keep your own Mr Darcy!

'Sorry, Gav, but it takes more than a wet shirt to look like mr Darcy.'

"Here's a less known Jane Austen novel that you might enjoy. It's about carpentry and lawn care, called 'Fence and Fencibility."

'You can tell when you're getting older when your ears are hairier than your head!'

Sense, Sensibility & Sid, Attorneys at Law. 'We cover all the bases.'

Elizabeth admired Darcy's £150,000 Philippe Patek

'Love your blog. Very Jane Austen.'