Jailbird Chuckler Gifts

'I made good money - until they added colour to the twenty dollar bills.'

'I confessed to killing the guy! What happened to, "The truth shall set you free"?'

"White Collar Prison"

Yoga Sequence to Avoid

'My biggest mistake was to make a 'death-bed confession'... then I made a full recovery!'

'He's been like this ever since he found out that he's a Rare Breed ...'

'Smooth move -- Now we're in REAL trouble!'

"I'm the first one in my family to do time."

Rudolph unblocking a chimney

'Sure I do bad things, but I do them in moderation.'

''Where do you see yourself in five years'? That's a stupid question! You know darn well I'll be finishing 5-years of a 25-year sentence!'

"The reason I never get any visitors is because all my family and friends are in here!"

We only follow one star round here, buddy!

"Miss Robins, get me a ladder and a hacksaw, if you will, please."

'Cold hands, warm heart,' my ass, thought Bessie.

"I keep getting into a flap."

'It's best if you take it one day at a time.'

'Look on the bright side -- we could still be in the MARKET.'

Love in prison.

'It was sort of like a penalty for early withdrawal. The bank hadn't opened yet.'

'MY doctor says I don't get out enough!'

'Your mother reckons you look like your baby photos now without your dandruff, dear.'

"The bad news is Lady Sybil has died in childbirth. On the other hand, Bates is back home and Tom's sticking around to help run the estate."

"He thinks you're playing fetch."

'Forget about it, we all try it when we arrive here, but it's a concrete floor...'

"I believe thr guv'nor used to own a boarding house in Blackpool."

Con Artist.

"It's no good you hiding, Whacker. Your release date's today and that's final!"

Merry Christmas

'There. Now you have the job security you've always wanted.'