Jack-o-lantern Fan Pillows

"Your candle has gone out."

"In my previous life I was arugula."

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

Build your very own conflict of interest!

"The fish sticks here are very good."

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

"It's not the persistent lack of sunlight or freezing temperatures that bother me - it's the crowds I can't stand."

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

"Of all the buildings I've designed, it's probably the most handsome."

"All natural snow cones for sale."

The Runaway Horse

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

'Charlie is the first to admit that he's too old for me.'

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

Stoneage puncture repair kit...

'Your shoe's untied.'

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

'Are you made of sugar?'

'I believe we've located the cause of your back problem, Mrs. Kangaroo.'

'You can just forget about the cake.'

'Do you think that's wise?'

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

Support group for sheep.

"NOW can I shoot you out of a cannon?"