Italian Food Joker Gifts

'It had taken some time, but the finding of a spaghetti junction brought immense satisfaction.'

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

"How fresh is the calamari?"

Bangers and Mash

'Eight wiener dogs, and six rolls. It's just not right.'

'Actually I'm a nerdivore. I only eat your lamer plants and animals: duckbill platypi, cumquats, daffodils, the occasional mudshark.'

Pope tarts.

'Would you care for some fresh pepper? Well too bad, because all we have is these dried up old peppercorns.'

'My brother's a proper cook - he's come as a witness'

I used to eat plenty of natural foods, but then I found out that most people die of natural causes.

'He's all eyes!'

'I'm going to bake you a sponge cake...where do we keep the sponges?'

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

"And your baskets include dead crickets, old socks, mice guts and toilet water."

Soup Company: Chicken Stock, Beef Stock and Laughing Stock,

"Eat more pizza and doughnuts and stop exercising. Just kidding, you should see your face!"

"You're right. The sunscreen does taste like ranch dressing."

'I have a thing about Italian food-my wife has a thing about Italian waiters !'

'Diet? Yeah I'm on a prop's diet...pies,chips,burgers and coke!'

"The chef will accommodate gluten-free requests, but only with a note from your doctor."

'Yes, chocolate moose.'

All you can eat chicken $3.95: "Cooked is 20 dollars extra."

Hell's Kitchen specials: Lawyer thermador, barrister kabobs, litigator flambe, attorney tartare.

"We know you boosted that milk truck!" "Admit it or we'll take a bite outta you!"

'Your tomato ketchup is on it's way, Sir...'

'You can do whatever you want, Herb, but I sure wouldn't take advice from a bowl of alphabet soup!'

'Make it four beers and an '02 Brunello di Montalcino, if you've got it, for you-know-who.'

'I'm sorry, sir, but cheeseburgers are out of season.'

"Just keep your eyes closed - it'll only upset you."

'Purpose of visit?'

Middle Age Spread.

'It's her signature dish.'

"Just how rare is this steak..."