It Security Gifts

"Next time you get a strange email with a paperclip, don't click on it!"

"Well the good news is that the system is completely secure,no one can get into it...and the bad news...It's because it's crashed!"

"Big data, firewalls and would-be hackers, they're nothing new . . ."

"It is against computer viruses!"

"Don't mind me, folks, I'm just here for regular system maintenance."

'I think I set the security level, on my anti virus software, too high. Whenever I access anything it is automatically deleted.'

'Now we come to step 86 of how to enter your new computer logins.'

Microsoft Software Detector Van

"Fire not bad. Opening up email attachments, no keeping operating system and software updated and banging on your keyboard is bad."

"I.T. says I need a padlock for my PC."

It's only an email, what harm can it do?

"One of our old servers has been hacked. Maybe whoever did it will give me my password."

"To Open This Attachment Or Not...That Is The Question!"

'A computer virus ate my business!'

"Hi, I'm the new IT-security-expert! Where is your server room? I want to see if I can overcome your firewall!"

Computer password.

"I've got a virus."

"What the .... either the boss became an alcoholic or we've been hacked by the Russians!"

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

The Anti-Agent

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

UK border controls relaxed.

High security Santa's grotto

"Always remember, sweetheart, that when the service is free, YOU'RE the product!"

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

"Someone’s in the kitchen. Did you lock up my kibble?"

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

"He's a guard dog."

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

'We subpoenaed all of 'Mr. Big's' electronic messages. They're in morse code.'