Irreverent Artist Gifts

Hitching Jesus.

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

'Oh, Arthur...You sweet, blind, mad, dear, silly fool....Don't you see it could never last?'

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

"Of course they're permanent. I'm an artist."

Man finishing painting through flap in door.

Texturing the Walls

"Sorry - He's changed His mind again. Stripes on the zebra, spots on the giraffe, no stars on the lion and make the elephant bigger and the amoebae smaller."

"Somehow, some way, we have to guide these people back to reality!"

Congratulations! - You have been nominated for the Turner Prize...

Weight lifter using his foot to take a photograph.

"Cliff's really devoted to his art. He'll wait hours for someone to take a shot to the groin."

"My two-year-old actually did paint that."

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

"I didn't have a carrot so I used a fish stick for his nose."

Stu just wanted to participate in the outdoor art class. . . alone. . . but Bob went ahead and invited himself anyway. . .

Boy copying abstract artwork in an art gallery.

A dog whose nose is a gun.

"Well, that's right. It is a disco ball. The regular lamp is in the shop."

Father Sinead takes confession.... "You did F%!&>$G what, you C%*T!"

"I see the radiator's Baroque again."

"Ok, let's sneak up on Mr. Canvas and see if we can make a good impression."

"It's ok for you! My cartoonist just can't adapt to his new varifocals!!"

'You said you went to night classes to draw birds, and when I asked whether they had clothes on and you said they didn't - you know I didn't expect this!'

'Hope you don't mind the boxing gloves. I'm no good at hands.'

"As usual, you're confusing your right to have an opinion with having your opinion respected."

'Allow me to suck the electricity out.'

'I've done everything that medical science can do...now I suggest you sacrifice a goat to Nagoomba.'

"I'm sure it's illegal to pose as a police officer"

Trainspotting.

'Orchestra Pit Bull.'

Our Planet

sub woofer

BLESS YOU

Henry Moore