Irreverent Cartoon Fan Gifts

Unbottled water is for sale next to bottled water in supermarket aisle.

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

At This Restaurant, There Are Only Two Dishes on the Menu and They Both Suck

Social Distancing Club

'One final question: Have you ever been disciplined, investigated or suspended for integrity on the job?'

"Since global warming the Abominable Snowman is much less frightening than he used to be."

"Seriously, just pull my finger ..."

'And we have an employee wellness program. By not offering health insurance or sick pay, we encourage wellness.'

"Do you do much walking?"

DOWN WITH THE KING!, 'Do you know what the PENALTY is for disturbing the peace during wartime?'

'Steve says that he doesn't understand why the liberals are so glum! They already have a majority.'

'Enter His Royal Globalness...'

Santa's Helpers

"I don't know how to tell you this, but it looks like you have a brain the size of a walnut."

Goodbye Opiate of the Masses

'Incidentally, our health insurance has limited eye coverage.'

Basically, you should think outside the box, but don't color outside the lines!

'It's one of the candidates for baptism. Wants to know if he can hold the hand that shook Elvis's hand above the water.'

"You may have heard some very slanderous rumours about this company."

"You finished with your peanuts?"

God Bless America, God Help Syria

"I think he just ashed on me."

"OK, well, if you do hear anything, be sure to give us a call."

'Have you heard about the new Medicare drug plan called plan C? Medicare gives you $30 for a bus ticket to Canada!'

'Forget about building trust. Just give the dog a bath.'

'Is it urgent?'

'Taking bribes is understandable, Senator, but you really shouldn't keep billing records.'

Their bubble-boss seemed completely unaware of the toxic work environment.

Father Sinead takes confession.... "You did F%!&>$G what, you C%*T!"

In Which the CEO Takes a Meeting with His Pet Senator

'Edna, the company was serious when it said it planned on promoting from within.'

'I hope you don't mind, dear — I got my ears pierced.'

'You know what I miss most - hugging!'

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