Ironic Vacationers Gifts

Death Takes A Time-Share

Southwest Hampton

'Maybe now you'll admit that we're lost!?'

"Do we have to go to the beach? I think the airline mixed up my luggage."

Workaholic's Hoilday Appartment

"I know we came in peace but these ones are already half cooked."

"I said isn't it great to get away from it all."

"Sure, it's 'beautiful,' Ray, but where are the outlet stores?!"

"Thank god we're out of the city."

'I keep telling myself that this is better than a crowded beach in Spain...'

"I've just about had it with these corporate retreats."

Bon Voyage

'Lager Lout'- 'Saga Lout'

"I learned how to pack small. I bought Brad a big suitcase."

"We'll see you soon, kids! Your mother and I have won a romantic cruise for two on some man's huge ark."

Tourist is told to go home by a monument

"Camping is a great way to get away from it all...just humans against nature...with nothing to distract us."

Easter Island.

Woman painting a man drowning.

'It'll be a working vacation.'

Hiker and the Rodents.

"I want to explore the brutal and true civilisation, to explore lands on troubled by tourist boards, and if you could sort five-star accommodation and decent Wi-Fi that would be perfect."

"You are going on a long journey. You will throw your back out putting your bag in the overhead. You will never recover from jet lag. It will rain every day. You will lose your passport. Your flight home will be cancelled."

Ski Vagaries in Switzerland

"Apparently our hotel is just a stone's throw from the beach..!"

Excess Baggage: From the 'Travel Promises that never meant to be kept' department.

'About my accrued holdiay pay...can you mail it to my offshore account?'

"You'll get three meals a day,but they will all be continental breakfast."

'This vacation has just come to a screeching halt - My pocket's just been picked.'

'I know you don't like to travel, but I just want you to run this down the hall.'

'Oh, great! We've been going round in right-angled triangle.'

'I need a vacation after that fishing trip!'

SS Norovirus of the Seas.

"Now I know why those cruise tickets were so cheap!"

On A Polluted Beach