Ironic Tourist Gifts

Carl's Glass- Bottom Bus Tours

Castaway Island

Woman painting a man drowning.

"Do we have to go to the beach? I think the airline mixed up my luggage."

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

Workaholic's Hoilday Appartment

Statue is moved to hold up the leaning tower of Pisa.

"I said isn't it great to get away from it all."

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

"I've got a better view on my smart phone."

"You're getting close. This is the gift shop."

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

"Sure, it's 'beautiful,' Ray, but where are the outlet stores?!"

"Thank god we're out of the city."

'I keep telling myself that this is better than a crowded beach in Spain...'

Touring Holidays - On the P***

At this exact location on May 23rd 1957, a bunch of people mounted this plaque to commemorate a surplus of funding for the Commemorative Plaque Society.

'And remember: just hold up this little green paper, and they will do whatever you want.'

"A large donation usually calms him down."

Death Takes A Time-Share

"The whole thing's much smaller than it seemed on TV."

Limbo Day at the Palace

Parisian Misguided Tours.

The summer the people depart, and life on Monster Island resumes its leisurely pace.

"I learned how to pack small. I bought Brad a big suitcase."

Despite hard evidence to the contrary it was still considered lucky to kiss the Blarney Spike

"We'll see you soon, kids! Your mother and I have won a romantic cruise for two on some man's huge ark."

Tourist is told to go home by a monument

"We saw the Great Wall and lots of pagodas, and I have a transplanted stomach."

'It'll be a working vacation.'

'You are now entering Crenton, the city with the most intriguing 'You are now leaving' sign.'

Hiker and the Rodents.

'I want to ship Daddy to all the places he missed visiting, because he was working so hard to accumulate the estate I just inherited.'

"I want to explore the brutal and true civilisation, to explore lands on troubled by tourist boards, and if you could sort five-star accommodation and decent Wi-Fi that would be perfect."