Ironic Comedy Enthusiasts Pillows

"How ironic."

"Pass me one of them, love."

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

"His first out-of-body experience."

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

"I've done this procedure so often I could do it in my sleep. But that's only happened twice – that I'll admit to."

"The fish sticks here are very good."

Dog Walking Services

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

Squirrel Chasing a Dog

Skiing.

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

Intelligent people laugh too!

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

"I told you playing Pin the Tail on the Donkey was a dumb idea."

"I'm afraid you could go at any time."

Clown throws a bucket of confetti over car at 'Jimbo's carwash'.

'He has your nose and my ears.'

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

"I've no idea. Maybe it's the slumber channel."

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"Well, I'm thinking about boarding school. Though I'm not sure they accept adults."

"They're comfortable."