Interview Magician Gifts

Interview.

'My tutor kindly agreed to help!'

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

'How fast can you hype?'

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

"My biggest weakness? I'm a perfectionist."

'You lack the expertise we're looking for, Mr Wheaton - but darn it, I like your attitude.'

'I know my resume makes me seem overtrained, but I really wasn't paying attention.'

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

"Help! I'm surrounded by idiots."

"We made a miscalculation, but it's consistent with our over-all strategy."

'We like your style, but hate your substance.'

'Herb will provide one of his concise interpretations of the quarterly sales charts.'

'I'll be a responsible and mature asset to the company, as proven by the lack of asinine photos of me on Facebook.'

'This wasn't what I meant by viral marketing...but if you can get it to work.'

"Okay...tell me again what training seminar we sent Bill to?"

'Thank you, Leo. Nothing like a roar to get us going in the morning.'

Experience is important, so I'm inclined to leave questions of ethics to those who have them.

Pizza time.

'I started out as a yes man, but I've evolved into a plucky devil's advocate who always sides with the boss in the end.'

I'd like to talk about absenteeism.

'Mr. Hickey really knows how to keep our stockholders meetings short and sweet!'

"Your answers sound rehearsed."

"I don't want to take this meeting off track, but... isn't Stonehenge amazing? Seriously, who did that?"

Man in meeting has drawn all over paper, table and chairman, who says: 'I have no objection to doodling during meetings, but it must be within reason.'

'When you do the article, is there any way that you can squeeze the factory into the picture?'

"I've decided the most honorable course of action is for me to take the blame...and pin it on Gordon."

'We'll talk later, Ed, but for now we have a quick and dirty solution to your objections.'

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"