Internet Savvy Gifts

To get past the gates of Heaven you have to now enter an internet style password

"I agree, a national conversation on privacy is wait! Yum...I've gotta share these pix!"

Web search for 'the fairest of them all'.

'Forget the birds and the bees. I downloaded that from the Internet. Tell me about day trading.'

Well, now I just hope someone finds it and updates my Facebook status.

Somebody hacked into my Twitter account. That explains why your tweets have been smart, funny and G-rated lately.

Colin didn't want to risk videos of his dates going viral online.

'The facts of life? Sure -- just type in this URL.'

Sparechange.com

'Actually, we just run your name through Youtube.'

"I know this movie just came out today. But it's been on the Internet for over a month."

"She would've been more credible if she hadn't kept saying, 'according to your Wikipedia page'."

e-shoes

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

Your Work/Life Balance Is Off. Shall I Auto-Correct?

Relaxing in the Sun

Weird things I do because of the internet

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

'When I took this job, I had no idea how much it would cut into my quality, family texting time.'

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

Online Dating

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

'I'll be a responsible and mature asset to the company, as proven by the lack of asinine photos of me on Facebook.'

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

"Shankar, I needed someone to dot the 'I's' and cross the 'T's' but that was before there was ChatGPT."

Happiness is spending late summer afternoon on a buying binge at the iPhone app store.

Back in my day, we were drawn with ink on paper, not on some fancy digital pad, but at least we knew we existed.

'And the wicked stepmother looked into her smartphone and said, "Selfie, selfie in my face, who's the fairest in this place?"

Aladdin conjures up a virtual genie.

"Ugh—someone in the group chat must have seen a squirrel."

Mr Jones is not seeing anyone in person. Do you have a webcam?

Early Learning Today

"Tommy? Hi, this is daddy. How's my big boy? Sweetie, daddy needs your help."

Victorian Selfie