Internet Agency Staff Gifts

"Do you get the impression poster companies don't like us?"

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

'I'd give you a raise, but I had to throw tantrums to make my parents give me anything as a kid.'

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

'Yes I'm sure we can find an opening for you, Mr Smith!'

We're transferring you to company headquarters so you can kiss company hindquarters.

'I sense we might be having a problem with our appointment scheduling.'

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

'You're in luck - we do have a temporary position in advertising'.

"This is our new head of conflict resolution."

"Thank you for holding. . .Your call is important to us. . .Yeah right."

An Intimate Union forms between Napster and the Pygmy Sub-Area of Central Africa...

Psychiatrist: Mind over matter filing trays.

Sometimes I feel the company would collapse if we weren't here.

When staffing agencies screw up.

"I think somebody thinks I've been away from my desk too long."

"Look, Mom! A broadband digital subscriber line followed me home. Can we keep it?"

Temp Employment Agency. Ah, I see that you have a short attention span.

"You've got web feet"

'Hello, is that the employment agency? It's about the domestic you sent me.'

Doo inc..can and no can.

'Botox.'

"I told you when you moved into Dr. Condee's office that his bookshelves were due to collapse any day."

'Don't worry about your small handicap: Santa is an equal-opportunity employer: It will turn out fine...'

With absolutely no warning, Phil crossed the fine line separating business from pleasure and was never heard from again.

Overly wordy travel.

"The buck stops next door"

'It's Jopnes Sir! He's showing off his ballpoint pen again!'

'When I said, throw him out, I didn't mean it literally.'

'It's all right, Dad -- it's a Buddhist chat room!'

Corporate Advertising Agency: WEEKLY SCAM MEETING

Drones

"We've checked, and it's fine with women."

"These EHR formats are an indecipherable headache to try and wade through. I miss the old days when the doctor's writing was all we had to figure out."

'Gordon, ever since you were given a chair with wheels you've been seen less and less in the office.'