Interior Design Humorists Gifts

Budget Recliner

Unfinished furniture.

"Do you know what DFS stands for? Designed for Scratching."

'Oh, just chuck it in a corner somewhere...'

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

Frog to other frog: 'Hey, nice pad.'

'I've had the place gob-stopper-dashed.'

Still Life With Nordic Track

Duvet nailed to the floor.

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

"Buying the largest TV on the market was a good idea. Mounting it was not."

Duck in a bathtub

Dog Bookends

Shaker furniture: The flamboyant years.

A slow-moving predator, the couch only needs to eat every few years.

"Reproduction furniture."

"The carpet really brings the room together."

"What do you think?"

Fire Escapes

'When we converted the pub into a house, we decided to keep some of the original features.'

Goldfish in Bowl, "And this is the sitting room and the bedroom and the toilet and...."

"We'll take it."

"Look, you always hated the wicker furniture and bamboo is scarce, so consider it a win-win."

I LOVE what you've done with the place!

'The principal says her door is always open, until it slams shut when you're in there!'

"You know they're just plastic, and I know they're just plastic, but take them down."

Duck has human t-shirts on wall.

"I hate these tower blocks. . ."

"Faux wood grain towel dispensers, matching toilet plunbers, herb scented urinal cakes, where's it all end, Stan?"

'Maybe he said store the wine horizontally...'

"There's slipping in the bath then there's slipping in the bath."

'It also makes a great hat rack.'

'I think the flat screen TV goes well next to my flat headed husband.'

Man escaping prisoner via feng shui

'Hey, I love the moat.'