Intellectual Impostor Pillows

The Artificial Intelligentsia

Professor Wiles grows insufferable.

"I lost some intellectual property here last night. Anybody remember what the hell I was talking about?"

'Eureka! After months of research and formulating algorithms, I've done it... I've discovered the secret to 'being cool'!'

They still don't get it, do they? They can't see we're aping them!

'Checkmate!'

Death comes to both the Archbishop and the Salesman in Venice

The Ascent of Man.

"But seriously do you think my eclectic knowledge of the history of the development of the claw hammer makes me more of a sex magnet?"

"Care for an oxymoron?"

'Sweetheart, It's time you knew... Your father isn't a real wildlife biologist.'

Broad Minded

Wilhelm Dilthey

How do bright women get pregnant?

"Here's a free tip for you, kid: learn how to brood. Most people in the world mistake it for depth."

"You've just proven that your job doesn't exist."

'Pasta imposter' "Oi! You're not vermicelli, you're cheese string..bugger off!!"

"Worst TED talk ever"

"About 77,000 years ago the human lineage split into two branches. Homo sapiens sapiens and Homo stupidicus dumbelsii."

After many long and costly legal battles Bergman and Reynolds decide to settle their patent dispute once and for all.

Book Token / Token Book

"He really overdoes it with his opening move ... "

"The Man Who Knew Enough"

"I flunked out my last semester."

"This book can't be very sophisticated...I understood it right away."

'Let's face it, his I.Q. is smaller than his shoe size. . .'

'If a painting can be forged so that even experts can't tell the difference, why isn't it worth the same as the original?'

"Look. . . I know that you think I'm a idiot, but I'm not a complete idiot!"

DIMINATI

"Every few years, a book comes along that’s so ahead of its time, so hauntingly beautiful, I’ll buy it and put it on my bookshelf."

Niels Bohr, Albert Einstein and Ernest Rutherford talking shop.

'You are charged with plagiarizing a seventeenth-century sonnet. Won't you academics ever learn?'

'That's intellectually dishonest, Sid.'

"Yes, all of them. I need a Zoom background."

Egg Head