Insurance Industry Buffs Gifts

'Mr. Dumont, I'm sure you can understand our reluctance to sell flood insurance to anyone who says they're from a town called 'High River'.'

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

'I'm sorry. It looks like your insurance company doesn't cover pre-existing life.'

"Do Mr. Reaper, do you have health insurance?"

'After giving a recorded statement to these people, being grilled by 60 Minutes would seem like a piece of cake.'

'The doctors all tell me that you have great medical insurance. They think your coverage might last through most of the tests that they have scheduled.'

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

"They say that 'laughter is the best medicine', which is great because your health plan doesn't cover the real stuff!"

"Be afraid my friends...if the government takes over your healthcare, you're going to be left with nothing!"

'I don't think you can claim for this as a substitute car ...'

"Do you cover hypochondria?"

Uncle Sam and health care.

"Hey, little fella. Welcome to the risk pool."

'The bad news is the Big Bad Wolf is coming. The good news is I've got some great rates on Homeowner's Insurance!'

Who blames who in health Insurance problems

'You know, our health plan doesn't cover dental.'

'Yea, I give away the fire. I make my money on insurance.'

'You mean that if one of us came to a sticky end I would receive a hundred thousand?'

'I'm sorry Bill, but some things in medicine we doctors just can't explain...like insurance forms.'

HOLY LAND INSURANCE CO. , 'Darn you, Methuselah! -- You've completely

"No, I didn't say, 'health'. I said I'm concerned about your wealth... Can you afford to pay my bill?"

"I'm not here to take away your guns—I'm here to sell you some overpriced insurance."

Reducing Health care costs with health and fitness programs

Bertha's: A bank that's more than a bank. It's also an insurance broker and a beauty parlor.

'Your coverages suggest it will spread rapidly to your wallet.'

Car insurance, breakdown cover, mobile insurance, home insurance, camera insurance... - 'Life insurance, health insurance, professional indemnity, and tax insurance.' - 'Let the bad times roll... heh, heh!'

Insurance company agreeing workers' compensation policy in a demolition company.

"With this policy, at the age of 12, he receives 10 marrow bones a month."

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

'What do I do now? -- the company I buy my malpractice insurance from is being sued for malpractice!'

'Your employer's health plan automatically cancels your coverage once you get sick.'

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