Insomnia Epicure Gifts

Counting ribs

Dog Nightmares

'It's midnight, do you know where your brain is?'

"Oh good, more time alone for quiet reflection."

That midnight hour when fleeting memories come home to roost.

"Where's the ball? Where's the ball?"

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

"Well, if you're still awake when the time changes, you'll lose an hour of overthinking everything, too."

The Forever Stamp

"May I recommend our Seared Filet with Lobster Cream Sauce? It's very photogenic."

"Call him Koffee- he keeps us awake!"

"My life must really be boring. I asked the guy why he hacked into my social media and he replied that reading it helps him get to sleep a night."

"It's the Chef Surprise."

Waiter: 'Your Tossed salad Ma'am.'

"Don't hold back on the toad legs now - I'm through with Nouvelle Cuisine!"

'Leeks can disappoint you and garlic will break your heart, but only onions make you cry.'

"You may not know this, but I've become quite the wine expert."

'Sure I sleep all day. She snores all night.'

'zzz sleep.'

"It's only insomnia if there's nothing good on."

It's always the same dream. I'm in therapy, analyzing my recurring dream.

'The nurses tell me that you're having trouble sleeping, so I thought I'd try a sermon just to help.'

Wide-awake.

"Wake up."

"Goodnight cerebellum, goodnight hippocampus, goodnight little neurons that jump to synapses, goodnight medulla, prefrontal cortex, with the pills that I take it won't be complex."

Cats. All they do is eat and sleep. Truth is, they don't even do that well.

"They were known as the tribe that didn't sleep."

"My nose whistling is keeping me awake all night."

"Sleep? No, I'm the anxiety fairy. How about a cuppa joe?"

Sleeping artist has been painting picture of sheep.

Insomniacs Anonymous - No Snoring

"I had to switch to tea, coffee was keeping me up all day."

'Insomniacs Anonymous. Next meeting 3am,Tues.'

"If you can't sleep you may as well be productive and guard the meth lab."

Wheel of Sleep Misfortune