Insight Seeking Gifts

Vending Machine: Epiphanies... Now in six yummy varieties!

'I think I just had an epiphany. How do I make it go away?'

"My first night in the lab and I was clearly the smallest brain in the place."

"All the celebrities come here."

'Have you tried removing the blindfold?'

"Now, let’s talk about your attachment issues."

"To listen to your instincts, press one."

"I knew there was something wrong when he stopped reading the obituaries."

Where the hell did you get that brain ?

"Are you blushing?!"

"...And in the dream, I was angry at my mother, so I told her she never gave me the love I needed... What do you think it means?"

'I seriously doubt if you've attained Nirvana yet - You've only been fasting and meditating for fifteen minutes.'

What passes today for 'nose in a book'.

An enlightenment seeker heads back from Truth lookign shocked.

This is Mr Smith from Big Data Mining. He says he's found an insight.

'The Existential Files.'

'What the hell is PIG IRON?'

People with anything valuable to say rarely become orators.

"Now there's one less conspiracy theorist in the world - or is there?"

'People are skeptical about everything I say!', 'Oh, come now!'

Second dates are trickier. They ask the same questions as on the first date, looking for inconsistencies.

Methuselah attends a job interview.

facts used in politics

Ahah! Now, my son, you�re beginning to understand the law.

The newspaper that psychics read every morning.

"You lying fink! Your dating profile specifically stated you were a non smoker!!"

"I'm 'The Drunk Divorced Overweight Chain-Smoking Middle Aged Man.' 'The Wise Man' is on the next peak."

'I don't have time to answer individual questions, but you can subscribe to my PODCAST.'

'What's that terrible smell?'

Lies on social media