Insight Collector Gifts

Sure - live it up - but be prepared to live it down.

Out of Order

Before the Internet

'I think I just had an epiphany. How do I make it go away?'

Useless information desk at trivia buff convention

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

"All the celebrities come here."

'Have you tried removing the blindfold?'

The Month of July

Late-Onset Epiphany

'Did you bring any money? - Enlightenment doesn't grow on trees, you know!'

Funky Facts: Elephants.

"A pessimist thinks that we've already arrived."

"Have you heard something that the rest of us don't know about?"

"...And in the dream, I was angry at my mother, so I told her she never gave me the love I needed... What do you think it means?"

I conduct comprehensive surveys - I ask my girlfriend.

First and last day as census taker...

CIA, NOW HIRING, 'My resume? - I memorized it and burned it.'

Walk, Don't Walk, Laugh.

An enlightenment seeker heads back from Truth lookign shocked.

This is Mr Smith from Big Data Mining. He says he's found an insight.

"Vince prides himself on his open mind, and you'd be suprised at some of the things that crawl into it."

Reporters growing on a tree.

People with anything valuable to say rarely become orators.

"Give me insights on marketing to your age demographic...and I'll give you a bright shiny penny."

"Hmm... I wonder what I can find to trigger my self-righteous indignation today..?"

Trending wise.

'Fenster, this memo accurately describes the human condition...but our job is to generate profits, not insights.'

'People are skeptical about everything I say!', 'Oh, come now!'