Fact Collector Gifts

Before the Internet

"I don't know why I know all this useless carrot trivia."

The Month of July

'We are pleased to honor the first graduates of this great university who have majored in the ever-growing field of trivia.'

Funky Facts

Funky Facts: Elephants.

"This is a mine of useless information."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

It's estimated that millions of trees are planted by forgetful squirrels.

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

Useless information desk at trivia buff convention

Rumors, lies and innuendo.

"I think I'll keep a diary..."

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

"Ever notice how grateful people are when you present them with facts contrary to their beliefs?"

Stealing thoughts.

'15% of Americans don't have chairs in their living rooms, and of that 15%, 73% don't even realize it.'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

'Jim's blogging his thought for the day. He doesn't have any profound thoughts, he just has one thought per day.'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

Funky Facts: Turtles.

Two computers, smaller one labeled DATA, the larger one, HYPE

Who's Dead

'Note to self: Buy little recorder.'

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

"I wonder what this was for."

'There are facts,there are factoids, and there are just plain fun facts.'

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

'You're so illogical. I can never win an argument with you.'

'How old is this vase?'

Conspiracy theories