Fact Collector Gifts

Before the Internet

"I don't know why I know all this useless carrot trivia."

The Month of July

Wow. I'm made up of around seven octillion atoms, my head has about 100,000 hairs, and I'll produce approximately 10,00 gallons of saliva in a lifetime. No wonder my doctor want to get some of my numbers down. Odd Facts.

TV Zoo Trivia

'We are pleased to honor the first graduates of this great university who have majored in the ever-growing field of trivia.'

Funky Facts

Funky Facts: Elephants.

"This is a mine of useless information."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

It's estimated that millions of trees are planted by forgetful squirrels.

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

Useless information desk at trivia buff convention

Rumors, lies and innuendo.

"I think I'll keep a diary..."

"Ever notice how grateful people are when you present them with facts contrary to their beliefs?"

I read on Candorville.com that was rank 29,705th in the world when it comes to attention spans. What? Aren't there only 196 countries? The article didn't just include human countries. It included the various animal kingdoms and the plant republics. Did you know that Americans have an eight-second attention span ... but the goldfish who live in little Lionel Brown's aquarium kingdom at 1492 MLK Way in Candorville have a nine-second attention span? Are you sure you weren't reading a humor column?

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

The Expert

Stealing thoughts.

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

'Jim's blogging his thought for the day. He doesn't have any profound thoughts, he just has one thought per day.'

'15% of Americans don't have chairs in their living rooms, and of that 15%, 73% don't even realize it.'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

Nearly a third of the earth's life-forms have gone extinct. Cut! Stop with all the facts. This is debate club! But we're using a cable tv talk show format! What should I say? Unsupported opinions

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

"Hey, Dad, guess what? My Honus Wagner baseball card is worth $2.1 million!"

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

"I wonder what this was for."

Two computers, smaller one labeled DATA, the larger one, HYPE

'There are facts,there are factoids, and there are just plain fun facts.'