Random Fact Collector Gifts

Fact-finding Tour Inside Joe's Head

Before the Internet

It's estimated that millions of trees are planted by forgetful squirrels.

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

"My doctor said I'm not getting any younger. I'd like a second opinion."

Useless information desk at trivia buff convention

"I think I'll keep a diary..."

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

I read on Candorville.com that was rank 29,705th in the world when it comes to attention spans. What? Aren't there only 196 countries? The article didn't just include human countries. It included the various animal kingdoms and the plant republics. Did you know that Americans have an eight-second attention span ... but the goldfish who live in little Lionel Brown's aquarium kingdom at 1492 MLK Way in Candorville have a nine-second attention span? Are you sure you weren't reading a humor column?

Stealing thoughts.

'15% of Americans don't have chairs in their living rooms, and of that 15%, 73% don't even realize it.'

The Month of July

"I've put every one of those vital master copies through here, and it took ages. Where do the copies come out?"

"No, I don't think you 'new break shoes', I think you need new break feet. You are supposed to depress the brake pedal you know."

'Jim's blogging his thought for the day. He doesn't have any profound thoughts, he just has one thought per day.'

What's your most popular drink? Why do you want to know? Why base your order on what other people are buying? Don't be a follower. Be your own man. If you're unfamiliar with a drink, ask what's in it and decide for yourself whether that sounds good. Or better yet, live a little. Take a risk. Choose a drink you've never had at random and see where it takes you. You only have one life. Don't live it following in the footsteps of other people. That's kind of harsh. No, it's the name of the drink.

"I didn't find out quite what I wanted about the economics of democracy but I did find an interesting article about the mating habits of the Patagonian Fruit Bat."

I conduct comprehensive surveys - I ask my girlfriend.

Funky Facts: Turtles.

'Note to self: Buy little recorder.'

Funky Facts: Elephants.

Google Magazine

Backdoor

"Sorry, but statistics don't lie: hippopotamus are more dangerous to humans than lions..."

'Mummy, Daddy, this is Wayne. Wayne once sat in a bath full of jelly for 24 hours.'

Airbus

"Hmm... I wonder what I can find to trigger my self-righteous indignation today..?"

"It says here the word 'brandy' comes from a Dutch word meaning burnt wine. At last, something appropriate to serve at one of your barbeques!"

"We never have any activities that make for cute anecdotes anymore."

'Never mind the fresh food nurse - at my age I need all the preservatives I can get!'

Evolution...the modern-brush fox.

Cut A Rug

TV Zoo Trivia

Train Of Thought

A frog catches an insect truck.