Infidelity Tales Pillows

'That was my wife calling from the conference centre - she wanted to make sure I'd put the rubbish out.'

'This marriage is turning into a complete farce.'

'Is that 'forsaking all others' bit compulsory?'

"Yes dear, you have worked very hard on the garden. Unfortunately though, you've put the compost on the weeds and the weed killer on my best roses."

"It's not what you think."

"Better get two dozen. She won't be able to hit you as hard with both arms full."

'How many husbands have I had? Do you mean excluding my own?'

"My dad was too much of a babe magnet for the marriage to have worked."

"Don't even start, Claire. You knew I was a snake when you took me in."

'There's a simple explanation, dear. Someone stole my identity.'

'Right, how can I help you?'

I was in a menage a trois...until she ran off with our marriage guide counsellor!

"Your husband is fooling around."

"Hold it right there buster! Is that a wedding ring I can see?"

The world's most uncomfortable guy on his first day at work. 'This company is run by all my ex-girlfriends.'

Anne didn't see the relationship as being over....

"… and then Roger discovered fly fishing and I discovered Gregory."

'Now, I'm curious as to why there would be blonde hair in your hairball!'

"You may not like what I've dug out, but you did ask me to snoop into your husband!"

"When he stopped to smell the flowers, his wife found out whose flowers they were!"

'The first wives club'

'I do still love you, Morton, but there's a subtext.'

"My wife can't make it tonight, she's on a date."

"Your wife ran off with your best friend? Interesting... go with that."

"I've never asked Ralph, but I think there's another woman."

'No, Keith. It isn't just the same as me bringing Teddy to bed!'

'-you would tell me if there was someone else, wouldn't you, Doris

"Public display of rejection"

"So you think I should just ignore it?"

And for sport we've goot a spittoon.

'...I'm leaving you for Reg next door'

'It's our wedding anniversary today, Pete, I bet my husband forgets all about it, again.'

'We recorded your wife's activities like you asked and-well...Are you sure you want to see the photos, Mr. Watts?'