Industrial Irony Lover Gifts

Chemoco International

Accident free button gives an electric shock.

'Where are we dumping the sludge?'

"We're tolerably self sufficient. Alistair, for example, makes all our own petrol."

"Didn't you know? We just drive around. This is a mobile toxic-wast dump."

"Why is it every time I need to go somewhere, the driverless car is taking itself for a spin?"

"OK, well, if you do hear anything, be sure to give us a call."

'You forgot the product label.'

"I don't mind out of control spending as long as it's on stuff I like."

'Some hackers have broken into the system. It goes in as molten steel, and it comes out as chicken gumbo soup.'

'Here it is - the world's largest miniaturization plant.'

A businessman sits with an executive toy of smokestacks.

'Is that computer, down there, the one you were having problems with?'

"Willis has kindly agreed to sum up our current financial position."

"There - now we're environmentally responsible."

'You don't know how lucky you are. My mortgage is worth more than my house.'

The Continuing Adventures of Mel Hufnagel, Corporate Head-Hunter...

"Management think staff need to use their initiative more, and they forwarded a 65 page memo on how they want you to do it."

"And this is where we add the natural goodness."

"We don't share your information with anyone. Plus, nobody listens to us anyway."

'I see we'll be sampling the wines of New Jersey this evening.'

"I'll breathe easier when the economy gets back on track."

'Who's the wise guy?'

"That efficiency expert you hired said I should get rid of you."

Leave Only Footprints, Take Only Photos.

"I told him to trim a couple of inches off the middle and he thought it was a fat remark."

"He's all the stimulus I need."

'We can't increase taxes on the rich - the rich are the ones who made America what it is today - and you only hope...someday...'

Awareness!...

"And this, gentlemen, is what one of our typical American workers looks before he gets fired!"

"You should have been here last week. This is clean coal."

"The microwave isn't working and I needed to heat my lunch."

'Sure, we can keep the floors clean. Well just use the stuff we bleach the flour with.'

"We must have had an order."

'I see that the new foreman has already left an impression on you.'