Industrial Investigator T-Shirts

"It's worse than it looks- he's the factory inspector."

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"I don’t know what your invention’s called, but it’s really irritating."

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

"And we are proud to say we only use the freshest artificial ingredients."

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

US v.s. Tech Giants

Honest Vending

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

"We'd better watch Cranston. He looks like a whistleblower."

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

Lady Justice and Confidential Files

Giant pandas doing surveillance in a zoo.

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

'Here, we started to be investigated...'

He's making a list --- Holmes solves cases quicker when he itemizes deductions.

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

This is the last time I ask Peterson to dust for prints.

'It was part way through the initial investigation that detective Walters felt as if he was being watched, but there was no one in the room. No one that is except the cat, who sat contently on the chair and watched him with an almost human repose.'

"It's either the Ten Commandments or the Mueller Report."

Acme-5000 Lie Detector

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

Flour, sugar, earth, air, fire, water.

"One day son, all this will be run by robots."

The lion statues in front of New York City Library are replaced with spies.

Sure, I'll take a sandwich

'So, in room 1 we sweat them. 2 is for grilling, 3 is for roasting. We leave them to simmer in room 4...'

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'

"Absolutely, Senator, in my mind it was always my country first, and obscene profits second."

'I believe the murderer is in this very room.'