Indoor Tanner Gifts

The tanning channel.

Bad fake tan day.

Wood Stain and Sun Tan Lotion

'With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!'

Sunbathing in Autumn

I know you're bored but you better not be doing that rain dance again!

-...And we don't discriminate against people of colour. -I've been on the sunbed!

IT staffer vacation tan lines.

"Be careful of that sun, Stewart. You're starting to look like the front page of the 'Times Book Review.'"

'Trucker's tan?'

"What should I wear to the living room today?"

'You'll have to excuse Gerald - he suffers from Seasonal Affected Disorder' (Naked man in arm chair in living room)

'I love us when we're tan.'

A gap between the solar panels

Olympic Torch Training

'At least they did a good job on him.'

"It's a belly button thermometer. When it pops up, I'm done!"

Sun Screen Denial - I Don't burn...

Sun Worshipers

How to spot a tourist on the beach.

'You're new here, aren't you?'

'Looks like they were sun worshippers.'

"I didn't know you liked ranch so much."

Hydroponic Gardening

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

Darling, you should have asked me to put sun tan lotion on your back and not the kids!

'Medium well, please.'

The Sun Bather

Gym/Tan/Donut

One isn't snubbing One's wedding, One is merely celebrating One's wedding by topping up One's tan.

"Rare, medium or well done?"

'Do you want it set for light, medium or butterball?'

"I smell bacon. Are you wearing sunscreen?"

"High time!"