Independent Warrior Gifts

Hargitay - you're fired!

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"Indeed - you're Mr. Gurkenman! After all the 200m meetings I remembered you much smaller!"

"Managing a major project in these challenging times requires IMAGINATION, the FIRST thing I'd like you to imagine is that you have a team to help you."

'She knew we'd try to talk her-out of it.'

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

Militant Pacifists

DO IT YOURSELF - Four new jobs we'll all have to do ourselves

"Now that she works from home we never get to use the computer."

"If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid."

'Thank God, no tasers in my day!'

'Lost in the Jungle I found this Buddhist retreat...'

"I know nobody here works with each other, but it seems like morale is down."

'Thanks for tuning in - we'll try to pander to you.'

Man struggling to carry a giant tv remote control with hundreds of channels.

Tai Chi vs. Chai Tea

Calm in the Face of Chaos

"Namaste! The divinity in me versus the divinity in you!"

"I didn't live through a global pandemic just so I could group hug again!"

'Democracy? I thought we were spreading love.'

'I got GI Joe Peace for my birthday.'

"sometimes it gets lonely being self employed and working alone."

After many long and costly legal battles Bergman and Reynolds decide to settle their patent dispute once and for all.

'Oi! Mind where you're going!'

Hippy fighting off medicine.

'I don't have a shortage of willpower. I have an excess of fairness.'

"Whose idea was it to pillage a zen garden?"

"It's tough sticking to a diet when you're surrounded by temptation."

'No, I'm still standing in this stupid line looking at the back of somebody's stupid head.'

Germ warfare.

"Some of the guys are worried about your commitment to the whole marauding barbarian thing."

Baby Doves in a Soldier's Abandoned Helmet

Tai Chi

'You haven't grabbed the remote, Henry. That shows improvement.'

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'