Immigration Officer Gifts

"Good morning, Nice queue You've all passed"

'Britishness Test.'

"And yet another headache for the Immigration and Naturalization Service!"

'Now, don't make a big fuss -- we're just migrant workers.'

Immigration - 'You haven't got enough points to re-enter the UK.'

'Bad news, Americans are now doing the jobs we used to do.'

Higher walls around the EU.

'Mind you, if they're any good at cricket or rugby they'll be more than welcome.'

"Get ready and get those fences up!"

Asylum Seeker Integration Centre - 'My colleague will show you where to get beaten up and abused by members of the British public...'

"As my attorney I was able to get you in on a work visa."

Europe and immigration.

King Canute's immigration policy fails to work

Ode to Joy - The Anthem of Europe

"Bevenion, if it's not too much of a problem, we'd like you to modify your name so that people can get a quicker ethnic fix on it."

"Now then, were you driven out of Ireland by religious, political or economic pressures?"

'Yes it's a long and illustrious family tree Mr Yousif, but what I really need from you is a passport.'

USA Express Deportation

'I'm sorry Sir, I can't allow you to enter this country. Your passport is okay, but your internet rating is lousy!'

'I was all for deporting you but it would have breached your human rights.'

"And keep your eyes peeled for tobacco smugglers."

Immigration: Let them in and Chuck them out.

Homeland Security Knows More About Refugees Than Trump's Finances

Relaxation of the visa regime.

Immigrants 'R Us

"Which countries have you visited recently?"

"Hi! - We hear that this is a 'nation of immigrants,' right?"

'See if they have their green cards.'

Schengen

UK border controls relaxed.

'What sort of job did you do in Poland?'

Vaccination Passport

Three wise men being stopped by customs.

Passport Photo

'Anything to declare?'