Immigration Agent Gifts

"We're rounding up undocumented foreign transplants that conceal evil plots against our country."

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Schengen

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.

UK border controls relaxed.

'Taxes are going up, but that's no excuse to earn less, Mr. Syms.'

Europe and immigration.

Vaccination Passport

"I thought about looking for work in England, but I hear they're capping bonuses."

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

"Oh my God, they're gassing refugees. Look at this family!"

Novak Djokovic has his visa denied to play in Australia as he is unvaccinated

'I don't have any formal training, but I do own the complet boxed set of 'Get Smart' DVD's.'

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'

Viva Belarus!

"With the fortune we have spent in technology, informers and spies around the world, how is it possible that you still haven't found where the heck is Wally?"

"For this job, we require someone with excellent multi-taxing skills."

Invade/Fail/Deny

"I can't imagine how things could get any worse."

'Due to recent staff cut-backs and consolidations, I'll be handling your death AND your taxes this year!'

Refugee Crisis

"You may think the government is a big 'Giveaway' program, but you can't deduct your tax as a charitable contribution."

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

IRS, 'It might make you feel better if you just think of it as a negative entitlement.'

Tax Collector

"Well, if it's a fairy story you want, here's a good one that arrived at the office today."

'Watch what you admit to. He once tried to fine one of my clients for looking a gift horse in the mouth.'

Obama visits Mexico

Dictator, Interrupted

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

You want an extension? Good heavens, man, we haven't even paid for Reagans boondoggles yet!

National Liberty and Tax Codes.