Imaginative Parent Pillows

"Delia, I’d like you to meet one of my oldest and dearest friends."

"Mom, there's a monster under my bed. Can we keep it?"

"Look Daddy, at least the poor economy hasn't affected the Tooth Fairy yet!"

'That's not the image I wanted to leave him with.'

'Good morning, Dad, It's your turn to be the cowboys!'

". . . and this little piggy said 'to heck with it. Let's all go down to the Market Tavern!'"

Children in fancy dress on the way to music lessons

"I read the book and it has way better special effects than the movie."

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

"Look Mommy, hat!"

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

"I only travelled with my umbilical cord!"

'She's just great with the children.'

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

A boy acting suspiciously

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

"Werewolves of London..."

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

"Whose turn is it to lick the knife?"

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

'If you can keep him clean for a day you can sleep in his bed tonight.'

Baby tells other Baby to call.

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

'Care to gaze upon the peaceful blanket of snow before I send the kids out?'

'Where do I put the batteries?'

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'

"You have a co-pay...two cookies and a glass of milk."

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

"Well, my dog cleans himself that way!"

"Time for bed, guys."

'And when you're done here honey, I have a nice periwinkle picked out for the foyer!'