Identity Enthusiast Gifts

'I'd like to report an identity theft.'

"Which one of us is me?"

'I'm not a hawk or a dove. I'm a dog!'

'I love how you're not like everyone else. Oh, sorry, I thought you were my wife.'

'Do you have any identification other than the collar?'

"I was born a doughboy but I identify as a crescent roll."

Frankenstein "Damn it! Not another ethic origin questionaire"

'It's not my real name.'

'I'm a Dutch American. What kind of an American are you?'

"Excuse me, but I happen to identify as a left-handed person and this is a right-handed mug."

Millennial

"I'll tell you my gender if you tell me yours."

"Does this count as photo I.D.?"

"The name's Bond. . .Yeah right, but not James Bond."

"Actually, Sally, my name isn't Mrs. Santa Claus... It's Barb. I'm not defined by my husband."

Dave couldn't shake the feeling that the only thing his secular friends could see was the black hat.

'So, you'd like to change your name from John to David?... Okay, that shouldn't be a problem Mr. Plonker.'

John Reid with his old ID cards.

Sisters Of St Doris - "You mean it's only monks...."

'In high school, you knew me as Princess...shortly after graduation, I had my name changed to Goddess.'

"That's not Spanish, is it?"

Name

"If you're uncomfortable saying your name, how about your pronouns."

"Which one more says 'Cool Guy?'"

"Look, isn't that Jane and Lester Hobson?"

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

A Punk Rocker Cocoon.

"When Harold first said he identified as a balloon animal I thought it was just a phase, but here we are fifteen years later and it seems to be working."

Incognito Bonito - 'I don't know me, but I do know you!'

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

Tom Cruise

'Squint your eyes and grit your teeth so I can make sure it's you.'

What really became of the boy named Sue.

Which One is Pulling Out?

"Really? 'Yeller'? That's what you want to name him?"