Identity Enthusiasts Gifts

"We're Beatrice."

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

A Punk Rocker Cocoon.

"When Harold first said he identified as a balloon animal I thought it was just a phase, but here we are fifteen years later and it seems to be working."

Incognito Bonito - 'I don't know me, but I do know you!'

Tom Cruise

"Actually, Sally, my name isn't Mrs. Santa Claus... It's Barb. I'm not defined by my husband."

Books: Names That Will Make Your Child Hate You!

"Really? 'Yeller'? That's what you want to name him?"

What really became of the boy named Sue.

Which One is Pulling Out?

"There's corporate me and there's me, and, by God, we both know how to have fun."

Dear Sadie, I'm just an aging Baby-Boomer who still believes in America, and sees all the good around me, but I don't understand why we've become so mean. How can I feel good about us again? Signed, Marlemarion. Great question. There's an easy answer as to how you can feel better about the world. Change your name to something normal! I just don't agree with the @#$% premise that we've gotten mean.

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

1,001 names to Embarrass Your Child for Life.

"Don't be fooled - that's Henrietta, cross-dressing again."

Mr Long and Miss Short.

Secret Identity Theft.

'I'd like to get in touch with my feminine side, Joe -- bring me a Bloody Mary.'

Happy-Go-Lucky-Father-Of-Two-Avid-Golfer-Longtime-Magnetic-Tape-Salesman-Kiwanis-Member or Thomas Pynchon?

'My Goodness! All these years George and I never guessed you were a superhero.'

Bear painting himself as a teddy bear.

'Apparently I was wrong about you being Elvis in a past life.. It turns out you were an Elvis impersonator.'

"I'm tired of being the cockroach you want me to be and not the cockroach I want to be."

"I'll tell you my gender if you tell me yours."

"Which one more says 'Cool Guy?'"

"These are my sons, Brayden, Caden, Aiden, and Maiden."

'Therefore I do christen this child 'Isyouis Oris You Ain't.''

"The floor is now open for discussion of what to name ou generation."

"High school uniforms?! Can you imagine everyone wearing the same thing every day!"

Luna - short for Lunatic.

"I'm a weasel in a mink's body."

'Come on, I've been waiting twenty minutes.' - 'Shut up. I'm choosing a name for my baby.'

"Seriously? 'Stalin'? That's what you want to name him?"