Ice Rink Joker Pillows

Taken down by a banana peel on the ice.

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

'Hole in one!!!!'

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

A Snowman falls down drunk outside a bar.

Golfer wears 'How's my driving?' t-shirt.

'When Einstein wrote about time and relativity he must have been watching a football game where the last 30 seconds took two hours.'

'... and finally, before tip-off, let's all be courteous and turn off our cell phones.'

Snowman Driver

The waterslides are fun, but the water seesaw, not so much.

'His wife is very supportive.'

"You idiots … we lost!"

"What?!! I'm reducing friction on the ice."

'Now, lift and squeeze the diaphragm.' ... 'Sweet.'

'Geez, Dad! You never scream your lungs out at the refs! Don't you love me?!'

Reach you goal! Financial Planners Inc. Quality Dentistry. Get you smile back! Anger Management Classes. Downtown clinic. Slipped on ice? Clark Law can get you cash$.

'Jim I don't think you have quite go this 'Iron Man Challenge' thing.'

'I swear it wasn't this cold before they invented the wind chill factor.'

"Uh ho. It looks like the Ref's giving him the yellow vuvuzela."

'He's got one more minute alone in the penalty box with my mother.'

'Okay, but for future reference; We never grit the ice in here.'

His Other Shtick

Finally, a big puffy hand for the losing team.

Offering a golfer a spade.

Do you really have to do that every time you make a good call? If refs acted like players.

Hold it! I dropped a contact lens.

Spiked Ball

Who's on First

'It was Bob's last wish to spread his ashes on the spot where he spent most of his athletic career.'

"He cost a million pounds, they should've spent another tenner on a pair of glasses."

Two fish about to play a prank on an ice hole fisherman.

Kanoe/Cayak.

'Time Out...Sorry, kid. Gotta make a change.'

'Simkins, I want a word with you lad...'

'I'm in good shape . . . I fitness swim up a waterfall!'